Chris: Hey, can I throw this away? Me: What is it? Chris: The SDG&E bill I just paid online. Me: No, give it here please. Chris: Why? Me: Library card. Chris looked at me and, with that look on his face that says, I love you honey and you are so adorable but sometimes I think we inhabit a completely different universe, and said aloud, “Heh, you’re a nerd.” And if you do not know why I need a copy of a recent bill with my name on it for my first library card in this city, then you are…
I have been spending a lot of time lately developing my relationship with Southwest Airlines. Aside from all the fun and games that comes along with frequent flyer-ship, I’ve also spent enough time reading Spirit magazine to realize that the July issue of the crossword puzzle was missing half of the clues for the “down” column. This made me reminisce on another solution-less puzzle that I came across during my college days. I have always been a big fan of Dots candy. You know, the gumdrops that come in the yellow box. I don’t know if they still do, but…
I was in line at the post office today, waiting to purchase some stamps. There were two postal workers at the counter, and only a handful of people in line. It should have been a short wait. Unfortunately, it was apparently the day that all the “special” people fulfill their postal needs, because the entire time I was there, one of the workers was helping the same customer. Shortly after I walked in, the second worker finished helping someone mail a package, and the man in front of me went up to the counter. He had a small CD in…
It should be common knowledge by now that the cat is on a diet. Which, of course, she hates. We have an automatic feeder for her, set to go off at 6pm every evening and dispense 1/4 cup of cat food. Every evening, at 5pm, Maia can be found sitting patiently next to the feeder, and she will sit there for an hour until it makes the magic noise at 6pm which means the food is about to fall into the bowl. Sometimes, however, she gets a little desperate. Like a little kid at a candy machine, she knows where…
Flashback Friday: when I make 2,220 people delay their vacation so that I can get a cup of coffee. Shortly after I moved to Arizona, my new friend SuzyQ and I planned a 3-day cruise from Long Beach, CA to Ensenada, Mexico. It was supposed to be a girl’s trip, but one by one people slowly backed out until all that was left was SuzyQ and myself. We decided to go anyway. The drive from Phoenix to LA is about 6 hours, so we drove up the night before and stayed with my best friend in Laguna Niguel. That part…
In order to properly understand the reference here, you must be familiar with both a) the 2004 movie Eurotrip and b) the Bloodhound Gang’s 1996 remake to “Fire Water Burn” in which the lyrics are: “the roof! the roof! the roof is on fire!” My roommate and I watched the movie Eurotrip shortly after it came out on video. For some reason that is now unknown to me, we thought that scene where the guy’s hat was on fire and he mistook his friend’s warning for a feisty rendition of that song was the funniest thing EVER. It was a running joke between us…
A few weekends ago, The Husband and I went to an outdoor country music festival known as “Country Thunder” located in the nearby town of Florence, AZ. The headliners for the night were Willie Nelson and Kid Rock. We did the usual giant-outdoor-music-festival activities, which included: Browsing the sales booths with the trashy t-shirts Spending 20 minutes trying to guess how many food/drinks you will eat/drink so you don’t have leftover food and beverage “tickets” and yet you don’t have to stand in line again Spending an insane amount of money on “tickets” for food and beverages Playing the beanbag…
So imagine that you’re flying back to California after a nice visit with your family in Helena. You’re headed back with another friend of yours, nickname “Slappy” (and for once, I did NOT make this nickname up). The flight takes off and you close your eyes for a little nappy-nappy time. The next thing you know, you wake up and the airplane has made an emergency landing in Idaho Falls and your friend is in handcuffs for trying to gain access to the cockpit by claiming he is a space alien. Yes, I said space alien. Don’t believe me? Here’s…
Last week my husband and I were afforded the opportunity to go see the San Diego Padres play the Milwaukee Brewers, courtesy of a client. We got to sit in the sky box and watch the game while munching on appetizers and reclining on a leather sofa. Although it was a work thing, so we had to talk about work stuff every now and then with the client. All in all, it was a pretty entertaining game. And then there was the ride home. Because of the scarcity of parking downtown, where the stadium is, a group of us from…
Dear Mr. Loud Talker: I’m sure you probably don’t realize that your voice carries so well through the hotel walls. For your information, I can hear every single one of your phone conversations with crystal clarity. I really don’t need to know that much about your business. And I’m not trying to listen in, really I’m not. You’re just so LOUD it’s unavoidable. But here’s the thing. You know that really shrill, annoying, bell-like ring tone you chose? And you know that time, at 5AM, when most people are sleeping? That is a GOOD TIME for you to have your…